On the evening of 14 May, with camp just up on the Greenland ice cap, I realised I couldn’t stand on my right foot. Marty and Stephen helped me to the tent. We talked about how bad it was, what drugs I had, and I kept a brave face on. That night I was petrified.
This episode is the other side of the ledger. You’ve had the crossing and the why. This one names the fears on this road, one at a time. The foot, and whether it holds through four more years of training and three more expeditions. The solitude, because 20 days alone in Finnmarksvidda in February is where I find out what happens when the noise is gone and the dark voices come in. The money, because the whole road costs somewhere around $350,000 and that number keeps me awake. Failing in public, with the claim already out there. And the people at home, who watch you sign a contract that mentions death more times than anything you’ve ever put a pen to.
Why say any of it out loud? Because pretending fear isn’t there is how fear wins. And because fear is information, not instruction. There’s no bow on this one. I’ll probably be scared until I ski into the Pole in 2030, and that’s the point.
The full road: gerryvanderwalt.com/road-to-the-south-pole
Excited for some interviews with amagin polar adventurers! One has skied the exact piece of Antarctica I’m aiming for. The other is one of the most accomplished polar explorers alive. Coming soon.
Do good work.
G.
